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Sagot :
Salut salut !
Technological advancement to give advantages and defects to humanity, the children have grown and evolved in this environment, for them, nothing seems abnormal. For the old ones, the generations who were able to see a different life than their descendant, a life that could have seemed freer to them, they had no choice but to adapt, than to comply. The severity of a government does not seem to upset the populations since this one does not bother their comfort.
A point system was put in place. Firstly in China and then the other continents. This system might seem good at first, but over the years we finished by realizing the horror of acceptance that we were able to do. This scoring system was based on good behavior. First, we had several points and finally if we were too lower, due to a bad action or an error we couldn't do certain things anymore, like taking public transport or have access to certain exhibitions for example. But that was before the BUG.
Paris, March 2042, was the date when it all began. A computer bug, of immeasurable magnitude. He has devastated our lives. Phones, planes, pacemakers, rockets, everything ends up dying out. At first, nobody was panicked, all thought that it would come back like a simple power cut, but after several weeks, people have started to panic. This scoring system became the last of our worries. The dependence of humanity on technology was such important that most people were illiterate. The transports were unusable, communication, agriculture, everything was off. Contact with the outside world was impossible. Thefts, murders, and other crimes have multiplied. Humanity was gradually collapsing. Ignorance had created a climate of fear. Through this panic, the only thing that most of us thought was survival in this world eaten up by panic and fear.
Here we follow the adventure of a character named Tom, a quick-witted young student passionate about astronomy. After the disaster, Tom finds himself in an inability to grasp face oh this dysfunction. We follow his adventures in this new world devoid of technology, and his learning of a very different life from what he has known. Tom is quite a feverish character, although little things of his environment are unknown to him, being in this situation is a real constraint, a test which he must overcome in order to survive. This allows a real development of this character, of which at the beginning we first discover the fearful and weak aspect, then a rather thoughtful character and even ambitious, who first wants to repair this BUG, but who may be will ultimately decide another outcome.
Voilà ton texte corrigé, j’espère que ça va t’aider !
Globalement il n’y avait pas beaucoup d’erreurs.
Pour info, pour corriger ton texte j’ai utilisé l’appli Grammarly.
Bonne journée!
Technological advancement to give advantages and defects to humanity, the children have grown and evolved in this environment, for them, nothing seems abnormal. For the old ones, the generations who were able to see a different life than their descendant, a life that could have seemed freer to them, they had no choice but to adapt, than to comply. The severity of a government does not seem to upset the populations since this one does not bother their comfort.
A point system was put in place. Firstly in China and then the other continents. This system might seem good at first, but over the years we finished by realizing the horror of acceptance that we were able to do. This scoring system was based on good behavior. First, we had several points and finally if we were too lower, due to a bad action or an error we couldn't do certain things anymore, like taking public transport or have access to certain exhibitions for example. But that was before the BUG.
Paris, March 2042, was the date when it all began. A computer bug, of immeasurable magnitude. He has devastated our lives. Phones, planes, pacemakers, rockets, everything ends up dying out. At first, nobody was panicked, all thought that it would come back like a simple power cut, but after several weeks, people have started to panic. This scoring system became the last of our worries. The dependence of humanity on technology was such important that most people were illiterate. The transports were unusable, communication, agriculture, everything was off. Contact with the outside world was impossible. Thefts, murders, and other crimes have multiplied. Humanity was gradually collapsing. Ignorance had created a climate of fear. Through this panic, the only thing that most of us thought was survival in this world eaten up by panic and fear.
Here we follow the adventure of a character named Tom, a quick-witted young student passionate about astronomy. After the disaster, Tom finds himself in an inability to grasp face oh this dysfunction. We follow his adventures in this new world devoid of technology, and his learning of a very different life from what he has known. Tom is quite a feverish character, although little things of his environment are unknown to him, being in this situation is a real constraint, a test which he must overcome in order to survive. This allows a real development of this character, of which at the beginning we first discover the fearful and weak aspect, then a rather thoughtful character and even ambitious, who first wants to repair this BUG, but who may be will ultimately decide another outcome.
Voilà ton texte corrigé, j’espère que ça va t’aider !
Globalement il n’y avait pas beaucoup d’erreurs.
Pour info, pour corriger ton texte j’ai utilisé l’appli Grammarly.
Bonne journée!
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